I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
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