but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
