After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
