So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
