the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
