I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
