my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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