jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
