Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
