Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize
