the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
