Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
