We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
