The brown eye won't let me do that either.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
