make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
