if you like me you must not know who I am
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
