im so drunk with asians
where?
always
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Randomize
