I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize