He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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