Do you still have your period?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
