lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
Randomize
