Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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