he looks like a really good dad on facebook
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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