i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
you traded sex for a burrito?
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize
