Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
