Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
wow bdsm is so cute
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize