so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
