butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
