Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize