He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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