haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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