If i come over, it means nothing
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize