Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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