i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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