Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
