Do you still have your period?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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