btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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