Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Randomize
