she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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