I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
