Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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