Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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