He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
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