sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
