five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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