I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
