ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
