I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
