so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
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