what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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