party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
